The Best Part
I left the best part out of the medical narrative: but for those who like dessert first, here it is. The day of my chest xray, my terrible, unrelenting back and leg pain starting disappearing. At first I thought it was a fluke, but then it kept on going away. After a week, on Easter, it was just a little annoying. Two weeks later, I could sleep without any pain, sit for a few hours, I could even climb the jungle gym, slowly.
I went back to the PT I’d been seeing, who was amazed and pleased. She said it might be 6 months or more, after so long, before my back fully recovered said I should be patient, and gave me some strengthening exercises. She was wrong. Even lying in a hospital bed (horrible for backs), it continued to get better. I am still ginger with it, but today, I am ready to declare myself totally healed from my herniated disc.
Many, many people have commented that my back was trying to communicate something that my lung couldn’t—it was an alarm, and early warning system. Usually Ewing’s sarcomas have to get big, and therefore very, very dangerous, before they announce themselves. I was very lucky. Only I don’t believe in luck.
Here’s my takeaway—at least, the first of many takeaways from this whole experience: I was ashamed to want surgery, to want relief. I felt like it was a personal failure to ask for it. But if I hadn’t, it would have taken many more months to discover and diagnose my Ewing’s. How’s that for a holy spirit portal?
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